From having to stop your chippy getting stolen by seagulls to that fella who stands outside Forever 21 with his plastic microphone, here are 15 things you’ll know if you’re from Liverpool.
1. Everyone Else
When we say everyone knows everyone in Liverpool, we mean it. Even if you don’t know someone on a first-name basis, there’s no doubt that your nan’s cousin’s daughter’s fella does. If you’ve not got a connection with pretty much anyone you meet in Liverpool, chances are you’re probably a Wool. Alarse, but true.
2. It’s Home AND Bargain
It’s also a boss place to go in for makeup wipes and leave with a bag containing loads of unnecessary stuff for about a tenner.
3. We’ve Got Our Own Unique Vocabulary
You see, we’ve already finessed the entirety of the English language, so we had to make up some words of our own. Naff is Jarg. Specs are gigs. Your Dad’s your auld fella. We’ve even got our own names for places and streets. Aintree University Hospital? No idea what you’re on about. It’s quite obviously Fazakerley Hospital. St John’s Beacon? Who’s he? Ohhh, you mean Radio City Tower. Heavy, tha.
4. The Death of ‘The K’ Will be Mourned Forever
RIP, worryingly bouncy floors. RIP, random Rhino statue. Most of all though – RIP, never-ending 2-4-1 drinks deals, doubles as standard and free mixers.
5. Liverpool is a Lot More Than Just Scouse, Brows and The Beatles
Not that we don’t love all those things, but there’s a hell of a lot more to this lovely little part of the country than Cilla and Salt and Pepper Chicken. Look, you’ve got to remember that Liverpool is the centre of the universe. We’ve got everything! From amazing beaches to a World Heritage waterfront, more museums and galleries than anywhere outside of London and even filming industry hotspots all around the City – there’s far more to us than what people think.
6. We’ll Never Stop Looking After One Another
Community spirit in Liverpool is second to none. When people come over here, they never want to leave and it’s not hard to see why. Whether it’s a heart-to-heart with your taxi driver or just asking for directions, us Scousers are there with open arms. It doesn’t stop there, though. We’ve rallied together year on year to improve our City for those who inhabit it. From the Granby 4 Streets scheme to the Cotton Street Project – it’s plain to see we’re all looking out for each other and we never intend to stop.
7. The Bombed Out Church is The Only Place to Get a Taxi
Anyone who lives in Liverpool will know that the only place you should be ending up at the end of a night out – after inhaling your cheesy chips – is the Bombed Out Church. After hours, this Liverpool landmark magically transforms into the unofficial and honorary taxi rank of the City Centre.
8. That Fella with the Plastic Microphone/Guitar Outside Forever 21
Because this list would not be complete without him. He brings joy to everyone walking down Church Street and we must protect him at all costs. You do you fella.
9. Nightlife Here is the Best in the World
It’s no surprise we’ve been named the best city in the UK for hen parties. We think the nightlife here in Liverpool is the best in the world, ‘cause there really is something for everyone. We deffo have the best after-hours scran, too.
Three words. Nabzy’s, Red and Salt.
10. Protecting Your Chippy from Seagulls is a Military Operation
We seem to have our own special breed of extra-large, extra-brave seagulls who take delight in swooping down and stealing food directly out of our hands. If you’ve managed to leave Williamson Square with your sausage roll intact, you deserve a medal. We’ve even seen one stroll in and steal a packet of crisps from Greggs, yanno.
11. You’re Either a Red or a Blue
There is no in-between.
12. The Shush Woman
A woman who, ironically, never shuts up. Sorry girl. We’ve all heard those dulcet tones call “Come on GYERRRLLS” and echo down Tarleton Street at least once in our lives.
13. You Know at Least One Person Who Basically Got an ASBO for Putting Their Feet up on a Merseyrail Seat
As a kid, nothing instilled more fear in us than those yellow Merseyrail jackets. Gone are the days of drinking sh*tmix on the train into town.
14. You’ll Lose at Least One Shoe in The Raz
If you can face stepping foot in there, those suspiciously sticky floors will 100% take your footwear hostage. If you’re lucky, you’ll just be leaving with your shoes covered in that weird black sludge. Every now and again the prospect of a Fat Frog and ceiling sweat dripping into an eyeball calls to every Scouser who, many years ago, once frequented the establishment armed with a dodgy fake ID.
Also, it’s not called Blue Angel. That’s fake news.
15. Brookie Was, and Always Will Be, the Superior Soap
If you love Liverpool as much as we do, it’s rare you ever have reason to leave. If you’re looking for something different to do this month, though, why not spend a day or two exploring the city through a tourist’s eyes? Have a stay-cation at one of our hotels, eat and drink your way across the city and take in everything our amazing home has to offer.